Truck drivers girlfriend

OK, lads and ladies, so what do you do if your boyfriend is a truck driver? Option one: not give too much of a shit – we live in the world where women feel quite self-sustainable and independent – do your stuff, miss him a lot, enjoy your long-distance relationship as much as it’s possible and ride your own bicycle. Option two: make him company. Meaning, take the damn passenger’s seat. I have been choosing the first one for so long that the time has finally come try the other way out.

So here I am. Right inside the truck. Ooh, it’s exciting. Let’s put things straight right away: a truck is not a car. It’s not a van. It’s a spaceship. The routine here is unearthly. You don’t do detours around the house, walk from your kitchen to your bedroom, stop at the bathroom mirror, land on a couch with a laptop or a purring cat. Ten hours a day your body is shaking and you find yourself floating in a restricted area of two square meters with only one thing to observe: the outer space. Luckily, it gets pretty intriguing, with all those changing landscapes, dead animals on the highway, billboards announcing stuff about Jesus and giving tips to weary drivers about where to find inner peace, get your energy boosted or hire a proper lawyer for your undoubtedly existing legal issue. You are offered motels and Marriots, but you won’t go anywhere, coz your truck is the coziest place in the world.

Truck Road Trip

It actually is – the bed’s comfy, the Internet’s fast, the music is loud and nostalgic (a mix of the 90s and the 80s) or rhythmic and hot, just like your heart after this large cup of coffee you’ve just drunk (acid house or salsa). In relatively no time you start feeling like at home, and the idea of your house having wheels and speeding through highways and mountains and forests and towns is inspiring to speed your life up as well. That’s when you start doing whatever comes to your mind: watch some enriching shit on Youtube, dance in your seat, make pictures, edit pictures, sneak into the fridge for a treat, write a story, knit a sweater. Yeah, that’s right, you can even knit a sweater if you like.

Another thing to remember is that the truck is your Truckboyfriend’s extended body. He loves it (or her, as you might even hear him say) and gives it the best treatment. So be prepared to stop a zillion times a day and watch him run around with a screwdriver or whatever the hell that is, all covered in oil and antifreeze.

Well, meanwhile you can take a walk and have a chat with other truck drivers who are probably all old, tired and dusty, but the unprecedented sight of a young lady at a truck stop makes them rise from the dead and cheer you with a freshly squeezed smile. Oh, and there’s this undeniable attraction at some truck stops in the United States (yes, that’s where it all takes place, did I not mention?) – the truckers’ chapels. Those are basically big rectangle boxes with two doors (one to go in and the other to go out) which, I suspect, used to be trucks themselves. It seems quite a mysterious place to me – to be honest, I’ve never entered. But rumours say that people go there to spend some time with themselves and leave a corresponding amount of money on the counter. I hope it pays off and they do enjoy their little secret solitude!
But let’s get back to where we took off. Our holy world of the spaceship on wheels.

THE THINGS YOU CAN DO ON A TRUCK INCLUDE:

– Make shitloads of international calls that you would never find time for staying in one exciting place with no wheels.

– Pee in a cup (recommended to do only when necessary, but who knows, you might find the adrenaline rush that goes along with it too addictive to switch back to whatever we call civilisation).

– Try out doing make-up with your face stuck out of the window and the wind smashing your cheeks and glueing your eyelashes to your eyebrows (oh yes).

– There’s a so-called heavy motor vehicle yoga for those who fancy training the body and equilibrium simultaneously. Asanas strongly differ from the classical yoga you imagine – they include kung-fu elements, higher-pitched shrieks and most often cause a few bruises.

– Unleash your creativity looking for subjects to talk about with your boyfriend: at times you might find it extremely rewarding to start questioning aloud every single thing he does around his truck or in his life – not that you would get the point of what he says back to you, but there’s a high chance you’ll end up having a fun fight or disagreeing on the least meaningful matters. As for the more neutral topics (that are in no way less amazing, though), you can both inquire on the Internet about everything that’s been aching in your hearts since the dawn of humanity: how did the Moon form?, why do women have PMS?, who was the last to see dinosaurs?, how come there are lucid dreams?…

In other words, when you’re somewhere you wouldn’t ever imagine yourself to appear, the secret is not to focus on what you can’t do, but rather do everything you can do. Look at your five fingers, count your toes, and if everything’s in the right place – give yourself a wink, lick your lips and go make things happen.

Truck drivers girlfriend

 

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